It is crazy to think that in a few short days I will be starting Skyview Ranch summer camp. To me the journey of beginning a new thing is always tough. So many unexpected questions and thoughts, will they ever end? Maybe it is the fear of the unknown that can keep me from experiencing what God truly wants me to? Or maybe I am just not ready to open my heart up yet for selfish reasons? Hmm but all these things...what do they matter? I guess right now I am just in a questioning state, hopefully something good (even if it isnt the answer to my questions) will come from this. While in this state, the thought that is pestering me is am I the only one going through this? As folly as that question may be it is still constant in my head. Following that question comes reasoning, I say to myself of course I am not the only one going through this. Thousand of people have the same thought, at least I hope so haha. Why then do I still feel alone?
For the most part I am super excited to start Skyview, I made a change. I went for the unexpected route, I followed God's will to a new place. AAAHHH there is the true joy....following. By following the Lord's voice I am becoming a disciple. One who "follows" day and night. Listening, waiting, wanting to hear Him. Maybe my state of mind isnt so much questioning but one of uncontentness (if that is a word haha). Crazy right? I never thought I wouldnt be content while following Jesus, being a disciple. However the reality is that even the 12 disciple struggled with fear and questioning in Luke 8:22-25
22 One day he [Jesus] got into a boat with his disciples, and he said to them, “Let us go across to the other side of the lake.” So they set out, 23 and as they sailed he [Jesus] fell asleep. And a windstorm came down on the lake, and they were filling with water and were in danger. 24 And they went and woke him, saying, “Master, Master, we are perishing!” And he awoke and rebuked the wind and the raging waves, and they ceased, and there was a calm. 25 He said to them, “Where is your faith?” And they were afraid, and they [disciples] marveled, saying to one another, “Who then is this, that he commands even winds and water, and they obey him?”
Where is your faith? now that is the question that I should be asking myself, if Jesus calmed a raging sea then He can surely help me. Even before that though the disciples followed Jesus into the boat...key word being followed. The disciples listened to idea to go across the lake Once on the lake they were fearful of the storm, right now that is my fear the storm, the unknown. However I know where my faith is, it is in Jesus who calms the storm and who I will gladly follow even if it is to the unknown because when Jesus says come a disciple follows. So I challenge you this week to see where your faith is and listen to Jesus' voice.
Thursday, May 24, 2012
Thursday, May 10, 2012
Weakness
Aahhh the dreaded word of weakness. The stately manner of the post has just declined because of that word,some may say. Weakness is it something you fear or something to be feared? Can we grasp it or do we not want to have any part of it? These are the questions that I have been thinking about lately in relation to weakness. You see I do not always feel strong nor do I wish too. To further that thought I do not always feel confident or strong. Sometimes I feel weak.
I am going to equate weakness with vulnerability. That is a change in the direction of my post. You see to me weakness is a part of life. I am going to struggle. I am going to feel drained. I am weak. God does not call me to be strong 24/7 He says that in your weakness you are made strong. He will give me strength. After reading that my initial question is why then do I still feel weak? I thought I was suppose to feel strong. Well there is my problem...I want to feel strong I want, me ,me and me. I am so focused on myself that I do not have time to be vulnerable with God. The choice is mine whether I decided to be vulnerable and allow God to give me strength, and not just any strength but a strength that brings renewal and love.
It is so easy for me to constantly look as myself and feel weak, broken and burdened. Then from there to feel sorry for myself and to have the oohh pity me attitude. However God calls me to do something difficult, to not think about myself and to be vulnerable with Him. This is so I can be given strength. Lets just say it is easier said then done, but when it does happen God works through me and I am indeed strong. Not to say that I am not still broken or burdened but those things that weighted to heavily on my heart are not mine anymore because once I accepted that strength those are now in Gods hands.
So the craziness of this whole process is that I have to be weak to be strong...what? You mean I cant just be strong? I believe that the strength that comes through weakness is stronger than the strength that comes just because one day I decide that I am going to be strong. This is because anything that is of God isnt of me. Did you get that? ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that is of God is NOT of me. I am weak until God gives me strength. The strength of this world is fleeting and dull. But the strength of God can increase our weakness to make us strong "28 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. 29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.30 Even youths grow tired and weary and young men stumble and fall; 31 but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary they will walk and not be faint.(Isaiah 40:28-31)".
So this week if you feel weak give it to God so He can renew your strength because sometimes that is just the little push you need.
I am going to equate weakness with vulnerability. That is a change in the direction of my post. You see to me weakness is a part of life. I am going to struggle. I am going to feel drained. I am weak. God does not call me to be strong 24/7 He says that in your weakness you are made strong. He will give me strength. After reading that my initial question is why then do I still feel weak? I thought I was suppose to feel strong. Well there is my problem...I want to feel strong I want, me ,me and me. I am so focused on myself that I do not have time to be vulnerable with God. The choice is mine whether I decided to be vulnerable and allow God to give me strength, and not just any strength but a strength that brings renewal and love.
It is so easy for me to constantly look as myself and feel weak, broken and burdened. Then from there to feel sorry for myself and to have the oohh pity me attitude. However God calls me to do something difficult, to not think about myself and to be vulnerable with Him. This is so I can be given strength. Lets just say it is easier said then done, but when it does happen God works through me and I am indeed strong. Not to say that I am not still broken or burdened but those things that weighted to heavily on my heart are not mine anymore because once I accepted that strength those are now in Gods hands.
So the craziness of this whole process is that I have to be weak to be strong...what? You mean I cant just be strong? I believe that the strength that comes through weakness is stronger than the strength that comes just because one day I decide that I am going to be strong. This is because anything that is of God isnt of me. Did you get that? ANYTHING and EVERYTHING that is of God is NOT of me. I am weak until God gives me strength. The strength of this world is fleeting and dull. But the strength of God can increase our weakness to make us strong "28 Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God,
the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no one can fathom. 29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.30 Even youths grow tired and weary and young men stumble and fall; 31 but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary they will walk and not be faint.(Isaiah 40:28-31)".
So this week if you feel weak give it to God so He can renew your strength because sometimes that is just the little push you need.
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